Caucasian hand reaching out for help. Indoor photo with sunlight coming through windows. Image by Mladen Zivkovic (iStock). Image used for blog post Fear of Asking for Help: Not Wanting to Impose.

Image by Mladen Zivkovic (iStock)

Don’t Like Asking for Help?

When I was a kid, I hesitated to ask someone for help because I thought that I would be imposing on them. Fortunately, as an adult, I’ve recovered from this thinking. I’ve decided that it’s okay to ask for help and have observed that people like to help.

I’m a small person, standing at 4’11” (but I’m a big person inside!). When I go to the grocery store, I have trouble reaching items on the top shelves. I don’t hesitate to locate a fellow customer that is taller than me (that’s not difficult) to ask them for assistance to reach an item.

A beautiful moment transpires when this happens: the stranger’s eyes light up, they often go above and beyond my request (sometimes checking expiry dates for me), and after I’ve given them my sincere thanks, they walk away with a bounce in their step. The interaction built a brief but satisfying connection between us and has elevated both of our shopping experiences.

Create an opportunity for connection.

When we ask for help, the benefits are doubled. You get the help you need and you’ve made someone else feel good because they know they’ve helped someone. It’s a simple act for me to ask for assistance at the store. However, it creates positive vibes that last long after I’ve left the checkout line.

Sometimes asking for help also means you are helping yourself. – Renuka Pitre

During these pandemic times, so many of us are struggling. Any opportunity to speak to another person can provide significant support during these difficult times.

Are you afraid to ask for help?

There are other reasons why we may find it hard to ask for assistance. I’ll write about this in my next post.

P.S.: Subscribe to the faceyourfears blog if you’d like it delivered to your inbox! That would help me a lot. 😉

Two Caucasian hands together, forming heart shape, against blurred outdoor, sunlit background at dusk. Image by Suwaree Tangbovornpichet (iStock). Image used for blog post Fear of Asking for Help: Not Wanting to Impose.

Image by Suwaree Tangbovornpichet (iStock)

  • DJ MacKinnon
    Posted at 08:37h, 08 June Reply

    so true

    when I’d offer help to women who were obviously struggling with children, strollers, and groceries they almost always rejected the offer. I’d say to them – I’m sure you’ve got it down to a fine-art but it’s always nice to have another hand around and they’d usually agree to let me help them. Something in our culture about fear of looking weak or maybe fear of feeling obligated to reciprocate. In either case it is unhealthy IMHO for cooperative community building

    • Mona Benjamintz
      Posted at 10:45h, 08 June Reply

      You bring up a great point about times when people refuse an offer of help. I used to be one of those people. Then I learned that when I accept the offer, a beautiful spirit of cooperation and community is cultivated, just like you said.

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